Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
