yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
is your mom at the bar?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
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