Well apparently he's into motor boating.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
