Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize