is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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