All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
