Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize