YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
