Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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