my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Randomize