Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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