garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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