my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
