How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
