did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
