There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
