This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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