i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
