If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I wish you could order shots online.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize