I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I think weed is turning my hair brown
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
