I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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