i don't plan on having that self control this summer
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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