You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize