Me too!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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