they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
