uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
