this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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