I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
