turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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