you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
