Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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