So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize
