I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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