I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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