Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
