i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
