Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
did you just send me my own nude
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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