Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
