Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
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