I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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