it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
She announced her abortion via fbk
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize