turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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