office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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