This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Randomize