I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I wish i was in the wii world.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
