look no pants
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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