the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize