bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
