i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
