her vagine was all disorganized.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
pray to the hookup gods
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
