my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize