you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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